FOREWORD
Plato. The father of the West. A sexy five-letter man. Well, at least compared to Hegel.
Born as Aristocles, he likely earned the nickname Plato, meaning “the broad,” due to some serious muscle. What a champ. As the first of the Plato series, I’ll start with the trial of Socrates and cover the following dialogues:
Euthyphro
Apology
Crito
I will be using the G. M. A. Grube translation. I’ll give you the quick and dirty version.
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EUTHYPHRO
[ Socrates and Euthyphro meet outside the court in Athens. ]
Euthyphro: "Hey, Socrates! I'm here to prosecute my dear old father for murder. It's the pious thing to do."
Socrates: "Whoa, that's intense! What exactly is piety, anyway? I'm in trouble for being impious, so I need to know."
Euthyphro: "Piety is doing what I'm doing, prosecuting wrongdoers."
Socrates: "Okay, but that's just an example. I want a definition of piety itself."
Euthyphro: "Piety is what the gods love."
Socrates: "But the gods often disagree. What if they love different things?"
Euthyphro: "Well, they all agree on some basics, like not loving murder."
Socrates: "So, is something pious because the gods love it, or do they love it because it's pious?"
Euthyphro: "Uh, I guess they love it because it's pious?"
Socrates: "So, there's a standard of piety independent of the gods' approval. What is this standard? What makes something inherently pious?"
Euthyphro: "It's what I said before. It's about justice, like prosecuting wrongdoers."
Socrates: "Justice and piety—are they the same, or is piety a part of justice? If so, what part does it occupy?"
Euthyphro: "Piety is the part of justice that concerns serving the gods."
Socrates: "But we're back to the earlier question: do we do these things because they're pious, or do they become pious because they please the gods? If it's the former, what is the nature of this piety?"
Euthyphro (slinking away): "Hmm ... I think I'm late for something."
Socrates: "Come on bruh, don’t leave! I really want to know!"
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Wisp’s Note: Maybe because both are bullshit. Dilemma resolved.
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APOLOGY
[ Socrates is standing trial in Athens for corrupting the youth and impiety ]
Socrates: “I'm not a great orator, just someone who loves truth.”
“I wanted to refute the god of Delphi. He said the no one is wiser than Socrates. I couldn't believe him, so I set out to find someone wiser.”
“But no one I spoke to was wiser than me. Though we all know nothing worthwhile, they think they know and I don’t. Thus I became unpopular.”
“Some of the young men who follow me around go out and imitate me. The people they question—instead of blaming their own ignorance—blame me.”
"Thus came Meletus, angry for the poets, Anytus for the craftsmen and politicians, and Lycon for the orators. Together, they've put me on trial."
Meletus: “Socrates, you’re a corruptor of the youth. You teach them to question everything, including the gods of the city.”
Socrates: “Meletus, you say I corrupt the youth. Tell me, who improves them? Laws? Judges? Politicians? Citizens?”
Meletus: "Uhhh . . . All of the above."
Socrates: "So everyone improves the youth except me? That's absurd! And why would I do that, knowing it would harm me as well? Wouldn't I rather help them?"
Meletus: “You don't believe in the gods. You’re a weirdo with strange spiritual beliefs."
Socrates: “Ah, so I don't believe in gods, yet I believe in spiritual things? You've accused me of both atheism and introducing new gods. Make up your mind."
[ Jurors murmur ]
Socrates: "So we all see Meletus is full of shit. I’m actually here because many people hate me and want me dead.”
“So why risk my life? Well, a good person is only concerned with right and wrong. Achilles’ mother warned him that avenging Patroclus' death would lead to his own, yet he didn’t hesitate.”
"Fearing death is claiming wisdom one doesn't have. No one knows if death is the greatest blessing, but many fear it as if they knew it to be the greatest evil.”
“If you’d only acquit me only if I stop philosophizing, I must refuse. I'll continue asking anyone I meet: ‘Good Sir, are you not ashamed to seek wealth and reputation while neglecting wisdom, truth, and the state of your soul?’”
“If they claim to care, I will examine and test them. If they fall short of true virtue, I will reproach them for valuing inferior things over the most important.”
“This is a great blessing for the city. Excellence brings wealth and good things, not the other way around. I was placed here by the god, like a gadfly to a noble horse, to stir up the city. My poverty proves I’ve never sought personal gain.”
“One who fights for justice must lead a private life to survive for even a short time, so I avoid politics and speak to private citizens.”
“I've never promised to teach, nor do I have pupils. People enjoy watching my examinations. In fact, those I supposedly corrupted are here supporting me.”
“I won't plead for my life. Many 'great men' disgrace themselves begging and crying to avoid execution, as if they'd be immortal otherwise. And regardless, jurors should judge by the law, not grant favors or encourage perjury.”
[ The jury now gives its verdict of guilty, and Meletus asks for the death penalty. ]
Socrates: “I’m more surprised by the margin than the outcome; only thirty votes separated my acquittal from conviction. If Anytus and Lycon hadn't joined him, Meletus would have faced a fine for not getting enough votes.”
"So, what penalty should I propose for myself? I've done only what I believe benefits the city most: urging citizens to care for virtue above all else. For such service, I believe I deserve to be fed in the Prytaneum, like an Olympic victor, because I bring real happiness to you, not just fleeting pleasure."
“You might think I'm arrogant for suggesting this, but I am not. I will not wrong myself by suggesting a penalty I do not deserve. Imprisonment? That’s no better than death. Exile? Their elders would put me on trial too.”
“You might ask if I can just stop speaking and live quietly. But I can't; it would mean disobeying the god. Discussing virtue daily is the greatest good, and the unexamined life is not worth living.”
“I am not used to thinking I deserve any penalty, but if I had money, I would propose a fine I could afford. My friends Plato, Crito, Critobulus, and Apollodorus offer to cover thirty minas, so I propose that as my penalty.”
[ The jury now votes again and sentences Socrates to death. ]
Socrates: "Athenians, you'll be known for killing a wise man, whether true or not. Critics will speak against Athens. If you'd waited, I'd have died soon anyway."
“Those who condemned me think I didn't do enough to save myself. But I won't beg or demean myself. My accusers are condemned by truth.”
“I predict after my death, you'll face more challenges. Killing me won't stop people from questioning you. Instead of silencing critics, improve yourselves.”
“For those who acquitted me, my omens were good today—death isn’t evil. It is either a complete lack of perception or a relocation of the soul.”
“If it's like a dreamless sleep, it would be a blessing. Think of a night you slept soundly and did not dream. How few days and nights are more pleasant?”
“If it's a relocation of the soul, it would be a blessing. Imagine examining Orpheus, Hesiod, and Homer! I would willingly die many times for that opportunity.”
“I am not angry with those who convicted me. I only ask them to treat my sons as I treated them: if they care for money more than virtue or think they are worthy when they are not, reproach them.”
“Now, the time has come for us to part. I go to die, and you go to live. Which is better is known to no one except the god.”
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Wisp’s Note: Socrates always kind of bothered me. I finally can place my finger on why—this fucker reminds me of me. Granted, old Wisp liked saying “I’m right and you’re wrong” instead of “We both know nothing but you’re the bigger idiot,” but both are annoying as shit.
Ok, yes, maybe crying or flashing your way to freedom is dishonorable, but you could have proposed the fine or another minor punishment without all that windy bullshit in the beginning. And it probably would have worked.
Even if you don’t care about death, why rush to it? I don’t understand why proving a point is valuable but a life is not. They both seem pretty worthless to me.
But overall, good speech. Raised some really solid points.
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CRITO
[ Socrates is in jail. They can’t kill him until a ship from Delos returns for religious reasons, so he is sitting on death row until then. ]
Crito: “Socrates, wake up! I have important news. We must act quickly to save you.”
Socrates: “Ah, Crito, what’s up? Why so early? Has the ship from Delos arrived?”
Crito: “No, not yet, but it will come today. Listen, I’ve have arranged everything. We can bribe the guards and get you out of here.”
Socrates: “Crito, my dear friend, why should I escape? What would we achieve by breaking the laws and acting unjustly?”
Crito: “Think of your children! If you die, who will raise and educate them? It’s unjust to abandon them when you could stay and care for them."
“Moreover, not only will I lose a friend, but people will say that we, your friends, care more for money than for you. Your reputation and ours will suffer.”
Socrates: “My children will be cared for since I have good friends. And, Crito, just like you listen to your doctor and not a stranger in CVS, the opinion of the wise is more important than the opinion of the many.”
Crito: “Are you worried that your friends will get into trouble if you escape? Don't worry about us. Plus, we have friends in Thessaly who will welcome you.”
Socrates: “Thank you, Crito, but escaping is more than just the practicalities. Do we agree that the good life, beautiful life, just life are more important than life?”
Crito: “Yes, we agree.”
Socrates: “Do we agree that one should never do wrong, even if wronged? That wrongdoing always harmful and shameful to the wrongdoer?”
Crito: “Yes, we agree.”
Socrates: “Is doing harm any different from wrongdoing?”
Crito: “No, it's the same.”
Socrates: “Then, we must never do harm to anyone, even if they harm us. Please think carefully. If we agree, let's proceed with this as our foundation.”
Crito: “We agree. Please continue.”
Socrates: “Alright, let me ask you: when one makes a just agreement, should one fulfill it or break it?”
Crito: “One should fulfill it.”
Socrates: “So, if we escape without the city's permission, are we harming those we should least harm? Are we sticking to our just agreement, or not?”
Crito: “I’m not sure how to answer, Socrates. I don’t know.”
Socrates: “Consider this: if we were running away and the laws of the city saw us and asked, ‘Socrates, by escaping, aren't you destroying Athens? Can a city survive if its laws are ignored by individuals?’ What would we say? Should we claim, ‘The city wronged me, and the decision was unjust’? Is that our answer?”
Crito: “Yes, by Zeus, that’s our answer.”
Socrates (imagine laws speaking): “Do you think you have the right to retaliate against your country and its laws? You wouldn't retaliate against your parents or master, and the state should be honored more—you must persuade it or obey it.”
“By planning to escape, you would breaking your commitments to us. We offered you the choice to leave if you were unhappy, but you stayed, thereby consenting to live by our rules. You've lived here all your life, raised your kids here, and even at your trial, chose death over exile. Now, you're trying to escape like a slave.”
“If you flee to another city, you will be seen as an enemy of their laws. How will you face them, preaching about virtue and justice? You claim to care for your children, but will they be better off in Thessaly, as strangers?”
“Don't value your life or your children more than goodness. If you escape, you'll tarnished your soul, having wronged yourself, your friends, your country, and us.”
Crito: “I have nothing to say, Socrates.”
Socrates: “Then let it be, Crito. We must act as the god leads us.”
Wisp’s Note: Take the offer dipshit!! I’m losing hair!!!! I think our chief disagreement is, again, ethics. I take a more radical view on it, but I think his proposition that retributive punishment is unjust is a bit too far for most.
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Read more Plato. Or more Wisp.